Self-Care and New Podcast Episodes
Today I taught a workshop on Mindfulness and Self-Care and thought you might appreciate a chance to reflect on your own experience of self-care.
To be clear, this is not an opportunity to add more stuff to your to-do list or beat yourself up for not doing enough! It is also not an infomercial signaling that you spend a bunch of money on a spa-day (although that does sound nice doesn't it!).
Self-care is simply about noticing. Noticing what you need to maintain your health and a sense of well-being and making space throughout your day to support yourself.
Enter mindfulness
Remember that mindfulness is all about paying attention without judgment. It’s about really noticing what’s happening in the present moment. Noticing our sensations, thoughts, and emotions.
The present moment does not include the narrative we have going on in the background full of worries about the past and future. When we practice mindfulness, we try to quiet that narrative - or at least shift it to the periphery - so we can stay present, aware of what’s happening now.
So what does mindfulness have to do with self-care?
Practicing mindfulness helps us acknowledge our thoughts, emotions, and sensations so that we can respond to them. Ultimately, that’s self-care - responding to our needs. Certainly, getting a massage could be an act of self-care but truly, it's much simpler than that.
Self-care starts with the physical body.
It can be as simple as getting a drink of water when we are thirsty, eating lunch before our blood sugar crashes and our brains shut down, or taking a 5 minute walk when we’ve been in a chair for too long.
*Reflection
If you have a moment to take a pause right now, settle in and notice any discomfort in your physical body and any action you could take to address that discomfort. Whether you have the time and space to respond right now or you need to table it for later, commit to that action!
Self care also includes social fitness: building relationships and connections that support your well-being.
Studies show that connected people are both happier and healthier and that loneliness has a negative impact on our physical, emotional, and cognitive health.
And all kinds of relationships are important. The happiest people have a variety of interactions throughout their day - from simple exchanges at the checkout line, to friendly conversations at school drop-offs or before meetings, as well as more intimate exchanges with friends and family members. Variety in relationships is important but maybe most important is presence. In other words, having dinner with your family while checking your email, will not be as intimate or satisfying as dinner without technology.
Again, we come back to mindfulness - being truly present for our experiences as they happen. You may have lots of relational interactions throughout the day, but if you are not offering the exchange your full attention, then you won't truly experience it, and you won’t be nourished by it.
Cultivating connections as an act of self-care, requires that you really take in the connection and let it nourish you.
Like caring for the physical body, cultivating connections is an essential self-care practice because it regulates your nervous system. When you are stressed - chronically moving in and out of fight/flight/freeze, you can’t take in the goodness of your life. So while on paper, your life seems like the one you want, you can’t actually feel the goodness of it if you're dysregulated. It won’t feed you.
*Reflection:
If you have another moment to take a pause right now, reflect on a few of your relationships. Start with a seemingly insignificant one like your regular cashier at the grocery store or the neighbor that walks their dog at the same time you walk yours. Notice how inviting in this simple exchange feels. Does it bring in any positive feelings? Be with those positive feelings for another moment or so. Then invite in a colleague or a parent from your child’s school. Someone with whom you are friendly but not intimate. Bring to mind a friendly exchange and notice how it makes you feel. Again, be with those positive feelings for another moment or so. And finally, bring to mind a loved one with whom you are close. Notice how this relationship feeds you. Notice how it feels to think about this person. Notice how the space around your heart feels right now. Consider 1-3 things you could do to cultivate these connections - to engage with these relationships in meaningful ways. Again, commit to those actions!
At a base level, taking care of your physical body and cultivating connections are forms of self-care that help regulate the nervous system. And at a top level, caring for your body and deepening your connections lead to a more satisfying and fulfilling life.
The big message here is taking care of yourself means taking care of your body and your relationships. Keep it simple. Go get a glass of water and make a date to walk with a friend, have lunch with a coworker or sit down to dinner without your phone. It’s all self-care!
And now for a few resources:
~The Spain Retreat - October 15-21 - is only 5 months away!!! Now is the time to register and get those plane tickets. I have a few spots left and I'd love for you to join me.
~Two new podcast episodes
Both Heather Graham, host of For the Love of Self and Cora Naylor, host of Crack the Code are really lovely podcast hosts. Both episodes are about mindfulness and nervous system regulation but as always, each host has their own unique way of asking questions so each show has a little something different to offer. Click below to listen:)
Click to listen on
Spotify
or
Apple Podcasts
Click here to listen on
Apple Podcasts
If I can answer any questions, don't hesitate to reach out. And if we haven't connected in a while, I'd love to hear from you. How are you really doing? I'd love to know!
Sending so much love your way.
Rachel
And here are some other ways you can work with me...
If you want some support starting or recharging your yoga and meditation practice, join the Your Yoga community! Register here to start your free 7-day trial.
If you'd like to work with me one-on-one, I have a few spots available. Reply to this email if you'd like to chat about whether this is the right time and fit for you.
And you can find all of my online workshops and courses here.